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I Hope You Dance . . . |
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by Diane Gross - "Harley Girl"
I like to write about attitude and gratitude, living with a smile rather than a chronic frown. You know -- kind of like when we are shown a glass half way with water -- some of us say it's half full and some look at it as half empty -- some of us are positive by nature and some of us not! This story is about Tom, a friend who has phenomenal inner strength and positive attitude -- his need to keep on going forward even as death haunts his every thought. Tom is making critical decisions in his life because his health mandates it. He has cancer. He amazes me how he fights for his life. He chooses to live hard -- not to sit it out and be sad -- but to enjoy every minute -- to DANCE as long as his body has strength. Although I knew he was ill, I got to know him better when I found out he was selling his 1999 Harley Dyna Super Glide and I knew I wanted to buy it.
This damn disease is called multiple myeloma -- sometimes referred to as bone cancer because it's a disease that attacks the bone structure of the body. Actually, it's cancer of the bone marrow. It's rare for a man of his age to have this disease because multiple myeloma typically afflicts older people (60 and 70 years of age) -- and this was the reason it took so long to diagnose what was wrong. It had taken so long to find out what was wrong, the cancer had time to take its toll on his kidneys --and now considered a "high risk" patient. Although the disease and subsequent treatment limits him physically, it's so obvious that he is grateful to be alive. Can you imagine living every day forced to face the harsh reality of a disease inside your body that is not curable? Even though he recently medically retired from the USAF civil service, he stays busy. He works part time for the Sheriff's Department at ball games, he helps out at Macon (Georgia) Harley-Davidson when they are short-staffed, and he rode his Harley Night Train with his sweet wife Kelly holding on tight until he could no longer grasp the clutch! He put flashing lights on the back of my Harley and a new headlight that blinks during the day. He changed out my pegs when he got new ones and wouldn't take a dime for them or his labor. I watched him on one of his 'not so good days' working on my bike -- he knelt on the pavement with a chemo bag attached to his waist as the sweat abnormally poured from his brow . . . all with a smile on his face. He inspires me. He's given me a new perspective on what's important in life and what's not! When he had to give up his dream Harley, he bought a jeep cause he refused to sit home and mope. He told me it is NEVER too late to learn how to really live our life or how to properly treat others as well as ourselves. How life is too short to dwell on mistakes as long as we just learn from them. He takes time for the people in his life and vows not to take life too seriously - "just treat it with reverence and have fun!" There's a song out that describes Tom's spirit and attitude so well. Memorize these lyrics -- life is so short - so dance! The singer is Lee Ann Womack -- and her release is called "I Hope You Dance! " "I
hope you never lose your sense of wonder I
hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean I hope you dance I
hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter I hope you dance" WHEW! Those words give me goose bumps. Life is full of situations that call for us to either sulk or soar -- whether it's taking that risky job -- loving someone that might hurt someone or ourselves in some way, buying that motorcycle you always wanted - forgiving someone that hurt you regardless of the outcome. We all have crosses to bear - after all this is not heaven. Tom was dealt a difficult hand to play and could easily have said, "I'll sit it out." But he did not and will not! So, to my friend Tom and to all of you who are facing a decision point in your lives -- I hope YOU dance!" I'll be right there with you. "HarleyGirl Diane," as she's known in biking circles, can be reached by email via her real name, Diane Gross. Read HarleyGirl Diane's other stories -- click here. |
Even
though most of my stories on BoomerCafé are about memorable rides
on my Harley, this time I'd like to go off the ridden path. Well,
just this once. 
It's
what he told me about why he was selling his motorcycle that got
to me. "I HAVE TO get a HD Night Train. It's my dream bike --
and I have to buy it before I get re-diagnosed." He had been in
remission.